Disease, broken heart, broken dreams, pregnancy. . . just a few of the ways that too many girls have discovered that Love does not equal Sex.

You don't have to have sex to keep your boyfriend.  Self-respect offers that edge that says, "I'm worth  more than sex!"  Don't get pushed into something you don't want to do.  Don't allow your own physical desires tempt you or your boyfriend.

Even if you really love your boyfriend, it doesn't make sex okay.  Most often, girls end up feeling used and unsatisfied, while the guy will feel at least physically fulfilled, but probably not emotionally fulfilled.

True love is about commitment.  It's about valuing the total person, not just the parts that feel good in the moment.  Consider the consequences of being sexually active outside of marriage:
  1. Getting pregnant. 
  2. Broken heart that doesn't mend quickly or easily.
  3. Getting an STD.
  4. Messing up your future marriage relationship with painful memories or illnesses or infertility.
  5. Losing your self-respect.  Lowering your self-esteem.
  6. Having a relationship that is only held together by sex.
  7. Destroying your reputation.
  8. Having your future plans and life goals being laid aside.
  9. Feeling cheap or used.
  10. Denying yourself the opportunity to have real friendships with the opposite sex.

Did you know . . . .

. . . . that there are more that 25 Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STD's)?  Some of these have NO cure. 

. . . .that HPV-Human Papilloma Virus, known as genital warts is a life-long disease.  Once you get it, it's yours to keep.  It causes cervical cancer in women.  Condoms offer NO protection.

. . . . that HIV causes AIDS and has NO cure.  Condoms fail to prevent its spread 1 out of 6 times.  Or you could play Russian Roulette.

. . . . that Chlamydia is a bacteria that can be cured, but that 80% of girls have no symptoms.  This disease could disable a woman from being able to have children.  Condoms offer little help in stopping the spread of this disease.

. . . . that Herpes is a virus that has NO cure.  It's painful and can be passed to newborn babies.  Condoms don't offer much protections here either.


Choose your dates and boyfriends wisely.  Find out what his standards are.  If he doesn't share your commitment, then it will be much harder for you to stick to your commitment.

Group dates are a good, fun option that allows protection for all involved.  It's difficult to be alone and become physically intimate with lots of company.

Be honest at all times.  Let a guy know in the beginning that you're planning on saving yourself for your husband.

Stay fully clothed at all times.  It's like asking to be put right into the frying pan of temptation when someone has even one article of clothing off.

Set your limits before you even have a boyfriend.  Discuss these limits early so that you can determine how to keep your promise to yourself and to your future spouse.

Remember that if you have to find privacy to continue your actions (private touching, undressing, etc.), you are going down the wrong road.  Be in control of your commitment.

Safe Sex?  You decide. . .

. . . . For pregnancy, condoms fail 1 out of 5 times.  Yet a girl can only get pregnant a few days out of each month.

. . . . For STDs, condom failure is much greater:  1.  Disease particles are a lot smaller than sperm, which is what condoms were invented to stop.  2.  Condoms only cover a small area of body parts.  STDs can be passed by skin to skin contact where condoms do not cover.  3.  STDs are present every day of every month.

. . . . Not every condom is tested for holes.  They leak and break during use.  Condoms can be damaged in extreme heat or cold and can deteriorate during transportation.

Abstinence Educators' Network, Inc., P.O. Box 531, Mason, Ohio 45040
Phone (513) 398-9801   Fax (513) 398-3624